Extra olive juice
Makes the drink dirty
My excuse
For being extra flirty
A dirty martini
Simple and complicated
A bikini
Its appeal calculated
Shaken or stirred
Is irrelevant
Dirty is preferred
My experiment
A researcher charting
Cause and effect
Control and sobriety parting
The buzz perfect
How many sips
Does it take
For an eclipse
My shadow self wakes
Absinthe is illegal
In the United States
Restriction is banal
The green fairy great
That is my rationale
For the unreasonable mandate
I refuse to pay attention
To the rules of convention
*A green liqueur having a bitter anise or licorice flavor and a high alcohol content, prepared from absinthe and other herbs, and now prohibited in many countries because of its toxicity. Known to some as the 'green fairy.'
Note to reader: I have attempted to write the above verse in an open form of poetry called ottava rima. Ottava Rima is defined as a stanza of eight lines of verse with the rhyme scheme abababcc. Technically, to be a true example of the form, each line should be written in iambic pentameter.
Johnnie makes me mean
A bitchy queen
Vicious in public
An open flame licking gasoline
Speaking my mind
Unfortunately unkind
My words hurt
Delivered, sealed and signed
I like him straight
Cornering fate
Good behavior makes dull memories
Wicked times await
Scotch whiskey works quickly
Few would disagree
Johnnie does his job well
Setting drinkers free
He does not lie
No need to falsify
The truth lives in every bottle
To this, I testify
*Ruba'iyat or rubaiyat (Arabic: رباعیات) (a plural word derived from the root meaning 'four') means "quatrains" in the Persian language. Singular: ruba'i (rubai, ruba'ee, rubayi, rubayee). The rhyme scheme is AABA, i.e., lines 1, 2 and 4 rhyme.
This verse form was popularized in Edward FitzGerald's translation of the collection of Persian verses known as the Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam. In fact, Rubaiyat is a common shorthand name for this collection.
Dark as a starless night
Just as unexpected
A pint of Guinness is a delight
My muse and I--connected
Irish stout
Fantastic
No doubt
Drastic
The drink has bite
A rough lover
Don't fight
Discover
Guinness is freedom
Release
From who I've become
Peace
Note to reader: This poem was originally supposed to be a 'sestina', which is a six stanza, unrhymed form used by troubadours and made popular by the German poets in the 17th century. Anyway...I fucked it up. This is not a sestina. I'm not really sure what it is.
Stirring my bloody mary
With a thick stalk
Of celery
I make breakfast for my family
Muffins and eggs
My diet forsaken
My oldest son demands bacon
Asking for a sip of my bloody mary
My youngest holds on to my leg
My husband and I talk
Resolutions expressed shyly
Pretty lies our commentary
Our guarantees
Awaken
Frozen dreams, chilly
Our life on this prairie
Solid as rock
Different as nutmeg
Why renege?
With an existence so very
Secure...a rock
I sprinkle some cayenne
In my bloody mary
I need some more vodka really
My drink makes me silly
I nibble on eggs
Sip my disappearing mary
A new years query
Leaves me taken
Too much double talk
I'd like to take a walk
Our whole family
It's too cold--godforsaken
My baby still holds onto my leg
Suburban scenery
This moment legendary
*A million thanks to my friend, Lance, who came up with the idea for this post and the title
To be sung to the tune of 'Put Your Records On' by Corrine Rae Bailey:
Three small glasses all filled with Bordeaux
And they told me I don't need to hurry
Listening to my rowdy sons
Not sweet
Little boys are sent to play in the street
Maybe sometimes, we got it wrong, but it's alright
The more things seems to change, the more they stay the same
Oh, don't you hesitate
Girl, get your likka on, turn up your favorite song
You go ahead, let your hair down
Cashmere and shredded jeans, a drunken beauty queen
Just go ahead, let your hair down
You’re gonna get buzzed tonight, somehow
Don’t question why, please just let me be
Drinking gin in the bar by the roadside
(just relax, just relax)
Don’t you let those non-drinkers fool you
Let likka be your where and who
Maybe sometimes, we feel afraid, but it's alright
The more you stay the same, the more they seem to change
Don't you think it's strange?
Girl, get your likka on, turn up your favorite song
You go ahead, let your hair down
Cashmere and shredded jeans, a drunken beauty queen
Just go ahead, let your hair down
You’re gonna get buzzed tonight, somehow
Just more than I could take, boozin’ for boozin’s sake
Some nights kept me awake, God--I wish I was younger
I’m tired of being a prize, I just don’t even want to try any longer
Drink what you want to
Girl, get your likka on, turn up your favorite song
You go ahead, let your hair down
Cashmere and shredded jeans, a drunken beauty queen
Just go ahead, let your hair down
You're gonna get buzzed tonight, somehow
Some think of inebriation as a nighttime thing
Though some days require an adult beverage fling
Sometimes noon time is the witching hour
A pop of the cork dismisses willpower
It is five o'clock somewhere
Says the girl who enjoys a dare
The call of an intoxicant is strong
Seductive as a siren's song
Is drinking during daylight
Some sort of defense--like fight or flight?
To the nonbelievers I implore: Try it you'll like it
Just how much would be difficult to admit
Fuck tradition
There is power in submission
Sunshine drinking
Is for the free thinking
Drinking sunshine
Is beyond divine
