Adventures in Drinking

2010-09-22T22:36:00.000-04:00

Whiskey princess
gypsy girl
sweet and vicious
his wild pearl

gypsy girl
delicately fierce
his wild pearl
both chills and sears

delicately fierce
this hushed siren
both chills and sears;
freezes and burns

this hushed siren
uptown gilt
freezes and burns
broken, yet built

uptown gilt
sweet and vicious
broken, yet built
whiskey princess .

Ground Zero

2010-08-25T21:19:00.001-04:00

ground zero, (noun)
1: the point directly above, below, or at which a nuclear explosion occurs
2: the center or origin of rapid, intense, or violent activity or change; broadly : CENTER 2a
3: the very beginning : SQUARE ONE

a quick pour
of a spirit named after
the date when tequila
was first aged in
wood barrels: 1800

my salted neck
lime’s flesh
between my teeth
body shots
with a
superhero

his mouth
unplugged
my entire world
I was and am
the careless daughter
of a cautious man

drinking blue agave
with a beer back
way south
of my borders
hoarding electricity
while others searched for power

Girls Like Us

2009-09-21T22:29:00.002-04:00

Brilliant. Bright,
tough and beautiful--
like walking, talking
diamonds.
Ready for both:
rough and smooth.

Red wine confessions
shots of honesty
TRUTH: fierce and delicate
shaken, not stirred
in a martini glass.
Growing younger with each
girlish giggle.

Kitten-heeled warriors
balance
coffee and curiosity.
Artful science
traipses toward tomorrow
with pretty pink toenails

Late Night Scribble

2009-05-11T21:51:00.003-04:00

Inspired by Coppola Chardonnay

2009-05-10T22:06:00.003-04:00

good wine in
a plastic bucket
soaking in
machine made ice
an obvious injustice

blackberry cravings
wireless memories
two ugly lamps shine on
princesses in a
cheap hotel room

Though the above poem was written while drinking Coppola Chardonnay (which I adore), I must tell you all that my new favorite is Ghost Pines Chardonnay (photo below). It's the perfect balance of fruit and oak. I highly recommend it.

Bogle Phantom

2008-10-05T22:33:00.004-04:00

The name Bogle comes from the Scots word for phantom and this, their namesake wine, disappears like one too. A blend of 54% petite sirah, 43% zinfandel and 3% mourvédre, The Phantom is a haunting, fruit forward wine that begins with traces of blueberries, violets, chocolate-covered cherries and black pepper on the nose. Subtle notes of spice, clove and mocha complement the wine's fruit characteristics on the palate, finishing with toasting oak aromas from two years in a combination of one, two and three year old American oak. Enjoy now or let it rattle around in the cellar for a few years, but act fast, before the vintage vanishes.

Julie, Ann and I shared a bottle of this wonderful wine at Brix on Saturday night. Needless to say, my dreams were wild and in technicolor later that night.

Dilemma

2008-08-27T00:23:00.001-04:00

I should resist
another glass of wine
cease and desist
though I feel so fine

One more glass
wouldn't be so terrible
this time would pass
and be more bearable

Why should I abstain
from this Chardonnay cocoon
wine entertains
even though it's only noon...

Lush Lust

2008-08-25T21:42:00.000-04:00

Lush Lust

the lust of this lush
unparalleled
that first drink rush

to be held
with a drinkers grip
inhibitions expelled

cocktails give no lip
puppy love, a crush
eternal courtship

my wants make me blush
many faceted
the lust of this lush

Mischief--Inspired by Tequila

2008-08-24T21:46:00.000-04:00

these moonbeams
make that vacant
swimming pool
look so inviting

my dress is so
e a s y
to take off and I am
so warm, really

a skinny little dip
would be so fat
and juicy

once in,
the water is my new dress
it fits so well

he swims toward me and
we giggle like
naughty
mischievous
children

my discarded
red dress
watches us rejected and
dry

3 Lanturnes

2008-08-19T09:12:00.001-04:00

damn
I don't
have any
good chardonnay
left

all
that's left
is some old
wine I bought on
sale

cool
cheap and
last ditch but
it is all I
have

I've never heard of this poetic form before. It's called "lanturne" or "lantern" because it kind of looks like a Japanese lantern. It is a five line poem with a syllabic pattern of one, two, three, four, one. Has anyone else ever heard of a lanturne? I couldn't find anything about this particular form's origin.

Books, Poetry and Wine

2008-08-18T05:56:00.002-04:00

A few days ago, my book club met to discuss Lush Life by Richard Price. I loved the book and we had a great discussion for about 20 minutes and then somehow we started drinking wine and, well, you know how those things go.

I demanded a retake, obviously. Doesn't Kevin know that I like to be front and center?

That's better, don't you think? Anyway, now for today's poem, "D:"

dissolved decorum
d e l i c i o u s
I daresay
a diminutive dab
will do you
dysfunction dwindles
with each drink
distress disappears
dull is dismissed
Darling, let's discover
this delightful
destination--
definite and distilled

Poem Scribbled on a Cocktail Napkin

2008-08-14T23:41:00.000-04:00

after one too many
beefeater rocks
I can think only
of drunk skunks
on a Saturday night

while ordering Jack
with a beer back
I wonder how
a skunk
could be drunk

Right now, I'm
curious and I ask
myself if skunks
only drink
on the weekends

and what
exactly
does a skunk
drink on a
Saturday night?

these questions
melt into
nirvana
like ice
in my glass

Saadia Reads 'Shopping'

2008-08-14T10:02:00.001-04:00

Basil Hayden Bourbon

2008-08-13T01:59:00.001-04:00

bourbon undiluted
disorder recruited
gravity refuted
virtue polluted

tedium persecuted
ennui executed
necessity substituted
indulgence saluted

these times voluted
obligation muted
each drink computed
my essence diluted

*Darling Basilwire and Snz couldn't make it to my book event at The Book Cellar in Chicago, so they sent a bottle of Basil Hayden bourbon instead. Though I would have loved to have met them, the bourbon is almost too good to be true.

I've used sonic repetition in this poem. Sonic repetition is basically sounds repeated in a poem or another piece of writing. Many poets feel that sonic repetition is best left for performative poetry.

Johnnie Walker Blue Label

2008-08-12T00:10:00.000-04:00

top shelf recall
mind opening
memories
a door left ajar
only to reveal
a collection
of curiosities

pouring
two fingers of
atonement
should be
as easy as
savoring the taste
of this brilliant whisky

Tequila!

2008-08-11T00:22:00.003-04:00

After the shots, I wrote this poem:

Selfish

he offers

princess cut diamonds

with first class fixes

chinchilla guarantees

my weight in gold

protected in an offshore account

all for one real smile

and I still think

that he asks

too much

of me

Krug Observations

2008-08-01T17:04:00.000-04:00

through
the drinking glass
tuxedoed men
look like a line
of dominoes
waiting for a push

old ladies
with little girl voices
cookie cutter princesses
well preserved
dressed for battle
armed with artifice

unstable
this boozy, blurry realm
where little
white lies
seem to be
the new black

Saadia Reads 'Jack Daniels'

2008-07-27T23:19:00.001-04:00

Adrian

2008-07-13T23:45:00.000-04:00

my private serenade:
weeknight wonderful
while playing hooky from
accountability. Drinking
in dreadlocked dulcets--
full bodied and fine

sweet like sugar, he
whisper sings to me
while I ask for more
Cabernet. Brilliant
temptation with just
six strings and
five fingers

Does anyone remember my previous post about Adrian Bartholomew? The boy is trouble, but Irresistible (with a capital 'I'). I ran into him a few nights ago when I was with my book club...

Lifestyles of the Bored and Jaded

2008-03-24T21:54:00.001-04:00

hoping for matching socks
and meals that magically appear
an obvious paradox
both far and very near

mother's little helpers
play well with pinot grigio
one day whispers
yesterday is long ago

a sink full of dishes
hard to swallow screams
it's always Prozac wishes
and sweet Ambien dreams

A Recipe that Reads like a Poem

2008-03-11T01:13:00.000-04:00

written after drinking micheladas with my brother

if you squeeze
one unbruised lime into
a heavy glass mug
then add
a pinch of good salt
a handful of ice cubes
made with spring water
three dashes of the hottest sauce
you can stand
two long shakes
of smuggled worcestershire
and one ice cold Corona
you'll have
a michelada--
twelve ounces and
four satisfying syllables
of paradise

Saadia Reads 'Before'

2008-03-02T20:34:00.000-05:00

This poem is in my book: lavish lines/luscious lies. I think it begs to be read aloud!

Pandora

2008-02-18T11:01:00.000-05:00

Should I
open this box?
A polite trespasser
Dom knocks

Fern green box
a constant taunt
unsealed, available
what I want

Escape, I think,
if I relent
restraint devours
this wicked torment

opening this box
my quick fix
on my travels
along the River Styx

Abecedarian

2008-02-07T16:55:00.000-05:00

So, I made a bet. A stupid, f***ing bet. On Saturday night, I bet a friend of my husband's that I could go two weeks (two weeks!!!) without having an alcoholic beverage. It didn't seem like any big deal at the time I was making the bet--I have two children, after all--and I never drank when I was pregnant. I did make the bet after enjoying a few glasses of wine so my judgement might have been slightly impaired. The bottom line is this: I can not drink until 7PM on February 16th. Pray for me, Readers.

All I can think about is
Booze. Pretty bottles, entertaining spirits, the
Clink--ice dropped into a heavy, crystal glass.
Disappointed? Don't I know it.
Everyone seems to think that I
Flirt too much with Chardonnay,
Grey Goose and Guinness.
Heavenly, the variety
I'm normally able to choose from
Jumping up and down--a
Kid in a candy store or
Like a woman at Neiman Marcus. This
Myriad of mixes tempts
Not only me, but myself and I.
Often, my
Palate and my determination will
Quarrel. Quit it, my
Resolve
Says
To my palate
Understand this, my discipline keeps talking,
Vino isn't a necessity
Why won't willpower shut up, I wonder? I wish I lived in
Xanadu, where both
You and I know that
Zealotry is outlawed.

This is an example of an abecedarian poem. I would explain, but I think you probably get the gist. Plus, I'm too sober.

Absinthe

2008-02-04T21:51:00.000-05:00

absinthe
sweet green fairy
anise flavored liquor
psychoactive and powerful
burns through my granite facade easily
melting a fireproof box full of
good intentions, virtue
restraint on fire
absinthe

I have two different things to tell you, Sweet Readers. First of all, absinthe was very popular with 19th century intellectuals, poets and artists like Oscar Wilde and Vincent Van Gogh. Besides having a very high alcohol content (120 to 160 proof), Absinthe is said to induce a dreamlike state, enhance creativity and facilitate artistic expression. (Of course, I wouldn't know anything about that). Absinthe was banned in the United States in 1915 because of the high doses of thujone (the chemical found in wormwood). In March of 2007, the FDA approved a specially manufactured version of absinthe that doesn't have the high levels of thujone. Now, American absinthe drinkers can buy and enjoy the liquor legally.

Okay, now about the poetic form. The above poem is an example of a rictameter, which is a nine line poem with a very specific syllabic count. The syllables count 2,4,6,8,10,8,6,4,2 with the first and ninth line being identical. There is no rhyme scheme whatsoever.

Booze Clues

2008-01-04T10:22:00.000-05:00

a few sips

and I cruise

on an infinite fuse

toward my

sweet muse

to clarify

not confuse

not accuse

this is what

I choose

this is

my news

cheers

I effuse

these drinks

amuse

why would I

refuse

knowing to

snooze

is to

lose

Conundrum

2008-01-02T11:34:00.000-05:00

Carefully, I
Observe
Neverending syllables
Unfinished verses
No, I want to shriek, I will not
Do this literary labor
Right now, I want to
Unwind, ignore these wicked words and
Maybe have a drink

This is an example of an acrostic. An acrostic is a poem or series of lines in which certain letters, usually the first in each line, form a name, motto, or message when read in sequence. For instance, the first letter of each line of this poem is highlighted. It reads 'conundrum.'

Dead Soldiers*

2007-12-13T10:05:00.000-05:00

lined up, empty
dead soldiers haunt
translucent, trusty
glassy glares taunt

uncorked and spent
idle essence
vessel lament
boozy defense

front line fanatics
such promise
always democratic
more hit than miss

*I completely and totally support our troops. This poem is about empty wine bottles, which I've always called 'dead soldiers.'

Disco Lemonade

2007-12-08T15:48:00.000-05:00

sharp things
fade
as I sip
disco lemonade
this choreographed
charade
grey goose
escapade
forever, a
sorority girl renegade
having it
made
in this
lush shade
makes me think
about an upgrade
you got played
I giggle
provincial and clichéd
this cocktail
invades
you ask: another
disco lemonade?
Absolutely.
I'm not afraid.
You needn't
persuade,
D a r l i n g

This blog is sponsored by foodbuzz.com. They call me a 'featured publisher.' Check out my profile on their site!

Whiskey Senyrus #4

2007-12-01T01:13:00.000-05:00

another single
without pleases or thank yous
just pour the liquor

this amber drink is
imperative. My mind is
looking for comfort

whiskey peace is like
nothing i have ever known
just sip and you'll see

motherfucker, please,
your advice is exhausting
let me drink alone

*You may think that this poem is an example of a haiku, but it is actually a senyrus. "Senyrus" loosely translates as a 'comic haiku.' Whereas haiku are usually about nature and its physical aspects, senyru (plural: senyrus) is still a form of Japanese poetry that uses the syllabic 5-7-5 as a format--but without the haiku requirement of being thought provoking imagery. Dig? Mmmmkay.

St. Louis!

2007-11-28T23:07:00.000-05:00

Amazon Shorts

2007-11-20T12:55:00.000-05:00

Hello, Bloggers. I may have told some of you that I had been accepted into the Amazon Shorts program. Amazon Shorts is an innovative new program for readers to access exclusive short fiction and nonfiction from both today's bestselling authors and tomorrow's future literary stars. For only $0.49, you can download a story of about 2,000-10,000 words from a large and always growing library of writers. Downloads are available in HTML, PDF or plain text format and are always saved in your media library for future use. In addition, you can print out Amazon Shorts for future reading at your leisure. As of 1:00 p.m yesterday, my "short" is LIVE!

My short is entitled Flirtations and Booze. It is a collection of approximately 30 previously unpublished poems. The poetry contained in my short is not available on any of my blogs, nor will you find it in my book, lavish lines/luscious lies. (I will tell you that there are three 'Sin' poems included in the download) If you do decide to purchase my short, please write a review for me. The more reviews I have, the more exposure Flirtations and Booze will receive. As always, I appreciate your support and encouragement. Thank you for being the best readers ever!!!

Anyway, in other news, I took a selfish little trip by myself this past weekend. I thought you may enjoy this footage from the flight... (An Adventure in Drinking, indeed)

Hypnotiq*

2007-11-10T17:49:00.000-05:00

our nexus--
symbiotic
confidence--
quixotic
dissolves what's--
neurotic
turquoise blue--
aquatic
cocktail asylum--
antibiotic
swift sips--
chaotic
chat turns--
exotic
his promises--
hypnotic

*Has anyone indulged in this liqueur? Hypnotiq is a blend of vodka, fruit juices and cognac, for God's sake. It sounds like a bad hangover waiting to happen, but it was actually pretty decent. Truth be told, it was incredible and my night was even better.

Visit Hypnotic Online

Hurts So Good

2007-10-31T22:44:00.000-04:00

my vice
terse
and concise
excruciating
paradise
brilliant
on ice
once
twice
does not
suffice
at what
price
this glorious
slice
decadent
a sacrifice
hints of spice
my ache
precise
ignoring
all advice
to desist
no dice
leave me to
my own device

Once again, Darlings, Blogger will not let me post this poem the way I want to. Please click here to see the poem the way it is meant to be read.

Cristal Vindicates

2007-10-21T21:59:00.000-04:00

"Living well is the best revenge" ~George Herbert, English clergyman & metaphysical poet (1593 - 1633)

"I rhyme to see myself, to set the darkness echoing."~Seamus Heaney, Nobel Laureate--1995

she tolerates
the syndicate
they celebrate
bubbles dissipate

thinking complicates
infiltrates
seems to isolate
rather than liberate

bombshell detonates
indifference devastates
she has no duplicate
or alternate

fake friends speculate
as she decorates
should they imitate
or implicate?

this girl captivates
absolutely fascinates
detachment dominates
her reality separate

This poem is an example of sonic repetition which is not really a poetic form--it is more of a device, I suppose. Basically, sonic repetition is the repetition of sounds in a poem. So, in the above poem, 'ate' would be the repeated sound. I have written several poems using this device. It's one of my favorites because I can rhyme without apology.

Limoncello

2007-10-14T09:36:00.000-04:00

bright yellow
homemade
limoncello
crayon colored
leaves me mellow
greeting me:
h e l l o
my memories
of long ago
drinking with him
incognito
have some
limoncello
he offered
turning up the radio
kissing me
listening to zydeco
we studied each other
drinking limoncello

Happy Sunday, Everyone. God, I so love limoncello!!! For all the ladies out there, I suggest drinking limoncello with an Italian man at least once in your life!!!

Newsworthy!

2007-10-08T20:39:00.000-04:00

Hey, Everyone!!!

I thought you might like to see your favorite Girly Girl on the evening news!!! I was interviewed by Jake Miller at WGEM, which is our local NBC affiliate. We had a great time talking about poetry.

Have a great day!

In Vino Veritas

2007-10-04T17:09:00.000-04:00

vague
a blurry photograph
unrecognizable
i live
with lies

bewitching
bottles speak
sussurations
murmurs hum
with actual answers

wine tells
me
the truth
i need
to hear

Whiskey Before Breakfast

2007-09-28T00:55:00.000-04:00

Watching the sun rise
whiskey before breakfast
time hurries clockwise

yesterday is past
tomorrow--still distant
will these seconds last?

Adamant
these whiskey thoughts
they frighten and enchant

at daybreak, caught
between love and lust
indecision bought

Sweeping up stardust
dreaming of moonshine
in whiskey I trust
this moment is mine

This poem is an example of a terza rima which is an open stanzaic form with interlocking cross-rhyming. The middle line of each stanza forms the outer rhymes of the next stanza. (For example, the rhyme scheme would be aba, bcb, cdc, etc.) When the writer comes to the end of the poem, a fourth line is added to the last stanza to use up the rhyme that would have otherwise gone to the next. This form was used by Dante in his Inferno. My previous terza rima post is entitled 'History.'

Drunk Ass Haiku

2007-09-22T03:01:00.000-04:00

triple vision, yes
because I've had shots and wine
I'll close my eyes and

2007-09-09T22:29:00.001-04:00

I was having a great evening flexing my Saadia muscles. I found a new Chardonnay by Mad Housewife Cellars which was/is perfect for a late summer evening. Before I knew it, though, the bottle was empty...

I was a little surprised that the wine disappeared so quickly. Maybe I spilled a little or something. Anyway, when I went to open another bottle--I could not find my corkscrew. I could not find anything that could be used to open a bottle of wine. I tore my kitchen apart. I am almost 100 % sure that my husband hid all of my wine-opening tools and for that...he is in big, big trouble.

Party Of One

2007-08-18T10:54:00.000-04:00

snorts of whisky
vodka rocks
scotch neat
naughty knocks

bottles of wine
a generous pour
tequila shots
i open the door

Sambuca

2007-08-14T18:26:00.000-04:00

potent liqueur
drives me to drunkville
an enabling chauffeur
journey--downhill

tiny sips
felt in my fingertips
hips
limitation unzips

black licorice bitch
scratches my itch
flips my switch
recollections rich

affectation drowns
in this liquid escape
easily downed
my lush landscape

Sinatra

2007-07-20T19:38:00.000-04:00

Frank inspires
adult activities
words that wink
at grown up proclivities

blue eyed encounters
need dry martinis
long legs, fascination
absent boundaries

verboten
these Frank festivities
music that encourages
my taboo propensities

oblivion
such tender mercy
from this dull,
residential scenery

I rarely worry
about soft sensitivities
I'm more concerned
with making my own history

On the Brink

2007-07-01T22:26:00.000-04:00

one drink
I think
fireworks
his wink
that smirk
I swink
a perk
this drink
let's twerk
in sync
beserk
my brink
these quirks
excite ink
nice work
I think
another drink
I sink

Pharmaceutical Delight

2007-06-24T22:42:00.000-04:00

blurry
worry
all right?
not quite

manic
panic
xanax?
relax

chill
pill
love you?
I do

Drunk Dial--5 Haiku

2007-06-21T22:20:00.000-04:00

friendly fingers want
to reach out and touch someone
better not answer

what my phone needs is
a built-in breathalyzer
one potent blow would

lock up my keypad
or power off my cell phone
all would sleep better

the breathalyzer
a defense mechanism
so, what's your number

my boozy banter
equal opportunity
annoyer, for sure

Cocktail Party Blues

2007-06-17T11:39:00.001-04:00

B i g y a w n

what's new
how are you
chit chat
fuck that
tequila shot
on the sly
can't get caught
you know why
copycat
plutocrats
bourgeois brew
get a clue

I a m g o n e

Liquid Courage

2007-06-10T00:49:00.000-04:00

my courage is liquid
pour-able and wet
bravery that is fluid
makes me forget
insecurities
and hesitation
dry unease
these limitations
evaporate
with a double shot
my anxiety detonates
and I'm fearless. Somewhat.

Lil Kim Cento

2007-06-05T19:53:00.000-04:00

Lil' Kim is vile--there is no doubt about it. For some reason, though--I've been enjoying her music tremendously for the past week or so. I've been in a strange mood. Possibly feeling a little vile myself...An explanation of this poetic form follows the poem.

written after being mixed in with Bacardi Dark (yuck)

she's been a lot of places
seen a lot of faces
the baddest chick
flip you quick

like money in the bank
loan you out
if you're not straight
comb you out

the junk in her trunk
not made for chumps
this Barbie, dressed in Bulgari
always tries to leave in someone's Ferrari

pop the cork
roll up the hash
we know what she's about
sex, drugs and cash

all wrong, all right
all good,not tragic
find her tonight
she'll show you maa-aagic

*Centos, according to Stephen Fry, are cannibalized verse, collage poems whose individual lines are made up of fragments of other poetry. Often each line will be from the same poet. In mine above, all the lines are culled from different songs by Lil' Kim. Centos are a revealing kind of poem--meant to be comical, but also providing a productive way of getting to know a particular poet's way with phrase and form.

Previous Cento Post:
Anne Sexton Cento

Yaaay!!!!!

2007-05-30T21:27:00.000-04:00

Hi, Everyone!

I won't be around for the next few days because...I'll be in NYC at the BookExpo America!!! I will be there with my publisher, Diane Dorce of FireFly Publishing. For those of you who don't know my big news....

My first volume of poetry is now available on Amazon.com and Barnes and Noble.com!!! I don't think there is a picture of the cover up yet, so I'm posting it below:

Expect lavish lines/luscious lies in bookstores later this summer.

I want to thank each and every one of my readers. This book would have never been possible without your encouragement and feedback. I love you all!!! XOXOXOXOXO!!!!

2007-05-21T22:53:00.000-04:00

I have been tagged by Andrew the Asshole. The rules of this particular tag are: * Each player starts with eight random facts/habits about themselves. * People who are tagged need to write posts in their own blog about their eight things and post these rules. *

1. I can not resist a man with nice teeth
2. Chardonnay is my beverage of choice
3. I have a book of poetry coming out this summer
4. I'm getting my masters degree in education
5. My 3 year old likes to listen to Ludacris (and I let him)
6. I really don't like to leave my house
7. I am a voracious reader. I read several books at the same time.
8. I subscribe to Playboy Magazine.

Have a great day, Everyone!!!

Dom Perignon

2007-05-19T15:53:00.000-04:00

Champagne pops
an explosion
bubbles non-stop
righteous erosion

This sparkling wine
loosens my locks
melts my spine
stops my clock

Other men shake his hand
as I'm poured another flute
the Dom has taken command
it's been a fevered pursuit

Lucky man, I think
as I unravel, unwind
inhibitions shrink
our night...defined

Chardonnay, II

2007-05-13T00:03:00.000-04:00

sing to the tune of 'Home on the Range'

Give me a poem
And the freedom to roam
Plus a bottle of good Chardonnay

Whatever you've heard
When I'm tipsy and slurred
Is because of some fine Chardonnay

No, no I'll never change
I so enjoy these white wine days
Whatever you've heard
When I'm tipsy and slurred
Is because of some fine Chardonnay

Inspired by Noah, age 9*

2007-04-08T21:37:00.000-04:00

wine, wine, the most fabulous drink
the more you sip--the more you think
the more you think, the better you write
so pour some wine to keep words tight

*this rhyme was written because my oldest son, Noah, would not stop chanting 'beans, beans, the magical fruit/the more you eat, the more you toot/the more you toot, the better you feel/so, let's have beans with every meal!'

Allegory

2007-04-03T22:33:00.000-04:00

It's like this:
when I reminisce
the edge of the abyss
my memories—hard to dismiss

I remember what I was drinking
More than what I was thinking

Nights with Cristal, nights with Jack
Befriending Tom Collins and cognac

Flirting with princes and kingmakers
Street sweepers and heartbreakers

Forever finding solace in my drink
The missing link

Contentment can be poured
A smorgasbord

Of liquid selections
Drinkable perfection

A cocktail laboratory
My tipple territory
Fluid memory
Allegory

Peche

2007-03-19T08:54:00.000-04:00

Je parle pour pécher
tous les jours
Il s'assied à ma table
pendant que je coupe les légumes
pour le dîner
Il boit mon vinet
mange ma nourriture
qu'Il est à l'aise dans ma maison
j'apprécie sa compagnie

Translation:

Sin

I talk to sin
every day
He sits at my table
while I chop vegetables for dinner
He drinks my wine
and eats my food
He is comfortable in my house
I enjoy his company

Drink

2007-03-14T21:45:00.000-04:00

I
drink
drank
drunk

and get
crink
crank
crunk

then I
sink
sank
sunk

Acrostic*

2007-03-06T22:10:00.000-05:00

Obscenely expensive wine
Partake? I do, with pleasure
Unfair, really, that he has to work
So hard to provide these pretty bottles

Oblivious? I am, happily
Not concerned with the irony of
Enjoying this opulent buzz alone

*A poem or series of lines in which certain letters, usually the first in each line, form a name, motto, or message when read in sequence. For instance, the first letter of each line of this poem is highlighted. It reads 'Opus One.'

Shopping

2007-02-25T13:40:00.000-05:00

Sometimes, when I
shop
at this little boutique in
STL
on Clayton Road

They open a bottle of
wine
for me to
sip
while I try on frocks
and blue jeans

Everyone knows my
name
even the new girls
Sipping, I sashay
in
and
out
of the dressing room

The salesladies remember
the girl I
was:
devastating, aloof--and they
marvel
at my accessibility now

We talk about hemlines and
tummy tucks
the wine tastes
crisp
like I am drinking
money

Jack Daniels

2007-02-18T10:24:00.000-05:00

Jack hurts

makes me cry

He alerts

passers-by

To my every flaw

exposure

I am raw

he is secure

With his power

knows only strength

At this late hour

sees the length

That I'll travel

for oblivion and escape

Laughing as I unravel

Jack rapes

I despise him

he hates me

Forever

Sworn enemies

Overserved: A Rondeau*

2007-02-11T16:41:00.000-05:00

Always overserved, dizziness undeserved
My empty glass forever observed
I refuse to take the blame
For my tipsy acclaim
Can my sobriety ever be preserved?

Good wine should be conserved
Inebriation reserved
Heavy handed waiters have no shame
Always overserved

Wine weilding traitors leave me unnerved
With twisted motives--curved
Contributing to my Chardonnay fame
Unfilled goblets call their name
Balance swerved
Always overserved

*A lyrical poem of French origin having between 13 and 15 lines with two rhymes throughout and with the first half of the first line repeated twice as a refrain. The rhyme scheme is typically aabba, aabR, aabbaR in a rondeau.

Beer in a Can

2007-02-03T22:24:00.000-05:00

He offers me a can of lite beer
Unaware of the imports
That I hold dear

I suppose boys this young
Still drink beer from a can
My first sip stung

We talked about classes
Movies and hip hop
My second beer depresses

My reaction--surprising
Beer in a can used to be wonderful
The tinny taste appetizing

When did I stop liking
Beer in a can?
Adulthood changes everything

Dirty Martini

2007-01-28T16:02:00.000-05:00

Extra olive juice
Makes the drink dirty
My excuse
For being extra flirty

A dirty martini
Simple and complicated
A bikini
Its appeal calculated

Shaken or stirred
Is irrelevant
Dirty is preferred
My experiment

A researcher charting
Cause and effect
Control and sobriety parting
The buzz perfect

How many sips
Does it take
For an eclipse
My shadow self wakes

Absinthe*

2007-01-28T15:32:00.000-05:00

Absinthe is illegal
In the United States
Restriction is banal
The green fairy great
That is my rationale
For the unreasonable mandate
I refuse to pay attention
To the rules of convention

*A green liqueur having a bitter anise or licorice flavor and a high alcohol content, prepared from absinthe and other herbs, and now prohibited in many countries because of its toxicity. Known to some as the 'green fairy.'

Note to reader: I have attempted to write the above verse in an open form of poetry called ottava rima. Ottava Rima is defined as a stanza of eight lines of verse with the rhyme scheme abababcc. Technically, to be a true example of the form, each line should be written in iambic pentameter.

Johnnie Walker Black: A Rubai*

2007-01-20T23:36:00.000-05:00

Johnnie makes me mean
A bitchy queen
Vicious in public
An open flame licking gasoline

Speaking my mind
Unfortunately unkind
My words hurt
Delivered, sealed and signed

I like him straight
Cornering fate
Good behavior makes dull memories
Wicked times await

Scotch whiskey works quickly
Few would disagree
Johnnie does his job well
Setting drinkers free

He does not lie
No need to falsify
The truth lives in every bottle
To this, I testify

*Ruba'iyat or rubaiyat (Arabic: رباعیات) (a plural word derived from the root meaning 'four') means "quatrains" in the Persian language. Singular: ruba'i (rubai, ruba'ee, rubayi, rubayee). The rhyme scheme is AABA, i.e., lines 1, 2 and 4 rhyme.
This verse form was popularized in Edward FitzGerald's translation of the collection of Persian verses known as the Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam. In fact, Rubaiyat is a common shorthand name for this collection.

Guinness

2007-01-15T22:05:00.000-05:00

Dark as a starless night
Just as unexpected
A pint of Guinness is a delight
My muse and I--connected

Irish stout
Fantastic
No doubt
Drastic

The drink has bite
A rough lover
Don't fight
Discover

Guinness is freedom
Release
From who I've become
Peace

Bloody Mary (New Years Day)

2007-01-01T11:36:00.000-05:00

Note to reader: This poem was originally supposed to be a 'sestina', which is a six stanza, unrhymed form used by troubadours and made popular by the German poets in the 17th century. Anyway...I fucked it up. This is not a sestina. I'm not really sure what it is.

Stirring my bloody mary
With a thick stalk
Of celery
I make breakfast for my family
Muffins and eggs
My diet forsaken

My oldest son demands bacon
Asking for a sip of my bloody mary
My youngest holds on to my leg
My husband and I talk
Resolutions expressed shyly
Pretty lies our commentary

Our guarantees
Awaken
Frozen dreams, chilly
Our life on this prairie
Solid as rock
Different as nutmeg

Why renege?
With an existence so very
Secure...a rock
I sprinkle some cayenne
In my bloody mary
I need some more vodka really

My drink makes me silly
I nibble on eggs
Sip my disappearing mary
A new years query
Leaves me taken
Too much double talk

I'd like to take a walk
Our whole family
It's too cold--godforsaken
My baby still holds onto my leg
Suburban scenery
This moment legendary

Get Your Likka On*

2006-12-21T23:31:00.000-05:00

*A million thanks to my friend, Lance, who came up with the idea for this post and the title

To be sung to the tune of 'Put Your Records On' by Corrine Rae Bailey:

Three small glasses all filled with Bordeaux
And they told me I don't need to hurry
Listening to my rowdy sons
Not sweet
Little boys are sent to play in the street

Maybe sometimes, we got it wrong, but it's alright
The more things seems to change, the more they stay the same
Oh, don't you hesitate

Girl, get your likka on, turn up your favorite song
You go ahead, let your hair down
Cashmere and shredded jeans, a drunken beauty queen
Just go ahead, let your hair down
You’re gonna get buzzed tonight, somehow

Don’t question why, please just let me be
Drinking gin in the bar by the roadside
(just relax, just relax)
Don’t you let those non-drinkers fool you
Let likka be your where and who

Maybe sometimes, we feel afraid, but it's alright
The more you stay the same, the more they seem to change
Don't you think it's strange?

Girl, get your likka on, turn up your favorite song
You go ahead, let your hair down
Cashmere and shredded jeans, a drunken beauty queen
Just go ahead, let your hair down
You’re gonna get buzzed tonight, somehow

Just more than I could take, boozin’ for boozin’s sake
Some nights kept me awake, God--I wish I was younger
I’m tired of being a prize, I just don’t even want to try any longer
Drink what you want to

Girl, get your likka on, turn up your favorite song
You go ahead, let your hair down
Cashmere and shredded jeans, a drunken beauty queen
Just go ahead, let your hair down
You're gonna get buzzed tonight, somehow

Ode to the Day Drunk

2006-12-20T23:05:00.000-05:00

Some think of inebriation as a nighttime thing
Though some days require an adult beverage fling
Sometimes noon time is the witching hour
A pop of the cork dismisses willpower
It is five o'clock somewhere
Says the girl who enjoys a dare
The call of an intoxicant is strong
Seductive as a siren's song
Is drinking during daylight
Some sort of defense--like fight or flight?
To the nonbelievers I implore: Try it you'll like it
Just how much would be difficult to admit
Fuck tradition
There is power in submission
Sunshine drinking
Is for the free thinking
Drinking sunshine
Is beyond divine

Bring the 'Pagne

2006-12-17T19:32:00.000-05:00

Champagne
Hurts my brain
Even bottles that are mad expensive
Put my blood cells on the defensive
It doesn't matter if you have Cristal or Dom
Champagne does nothing but destroy my calm
The bubbles go straight to my head
In a matter of minutes, I'm dancing like a coed
The carbonation
Is the beginning of my damnation
'Pagne is deceptive
Unfortuantely, I'm always receptive
Its golden color, its tease-y taste
The way my decorum gets erased
I've paid my bubbly dues
I've sang the Veuve blues
Champagne needs to stop ringing my bell
Answering the call makes me unwell

Chardonnay

2006-12-12T21:45:00.000-05:00

The color of liquid gold
Appealing as a centerfold
Just as forward and full bodied
Drinkable food, mind feed
A sip starts the vehicle
Promising a tipsy tickle
Manicured nails tap at the crystal stem
Waiting to invoke mayhem
The finish chills
Thrills
Is bracing
Self-effacing
Empty bottles line up like soldiers--front line
Thinking of days past, roses and wine

Grey Goose

2006-12-07T15:22:00.000-05:00

I keep two grey goose minis at the bottom of my purse
To alleviate the dullness of the Mommy universe
Grey goose over ice
With a possible lemon slice
This drink owns authenticity
Is genius in its simplicity
To the casual observer my choice looks benign
Like I'm drinking water that makes me feel divine
No matter where I'm headed
You can bet I won't be clearheaded
Cub scouts, the movies or a play date
The minis are with me, my advocate
I don't need complicated mixers or suspicious tools
Just the vodka, ice, and a healthy dose of cool

Nyquil

2006-12-02T11:48:00.000-05:00

When I'm sick I don't mess around
The best remedy is simple, not at all profound
A bottle of Nyquil is all it takes
To kick my sick and get rid of the ache
It doesn't hurt that Nyquil tastes like Jager
I can get it down with nary a wager
Once taken, my world turns psychedelic
And worthy of it's own groovy biopic
The syrup makes me feel invincible
Like I could hunt down dinner and shoot to kill
Why is Nyquil available over the counter?
It's just a matter of time before my side effect encounter
Nyquil should be kept under lock and key
If not for you, then at least for me

Jager Bombs

2006-11-23T11:25:00.000-05:00

A shot that does more than get you drunk
Jager Bombs step up and get you crunk
Throw one, two or three back
This girl suddenly is beyond wack
Packing mack
In a Chanel sack
Like an instant replay, I see me doing shots
My game exploding like a hellified gunshot
Slo mo, fast forward--it doesn't matter
At any speed, my sobriety is shattered
Was that me talking about the East Side?
And places where heaven and hell collide?
Though I'm not really a liquor connoisseur
These shots bring out my inner provocateur
Jager bomb champion
Must be stamped on my forehead in neon
"Throw it back!" A strange man shouts
Then my brother shows up and my fun is out

Buzzkill

2006-11-21T21:59:00.000-05:00

A buzzkill happens more often than not
Late at night when you're feeling bloodshot
A stupid girl who talks incessantly
About her relatives in Tennessee
An inconsolable toddler
With a babysitting amateur
These are a couple things that murder my buzzy
Leaving me far less than warm and fuzzy
A buzz is fleeting and easily killed
Just like new shoes are easily billed
People, protect your good times with vigilance
Memories are not made without diligence

Red Wine

2006-11-21T08:47:00.000-05:00

Even though I kind of live in a bubble
Red wine still manages to get me into trouble
Just a few sips of a ruby cabernet
Has me showing strangers my lingerie
I don't know why red wine affects me like this
When white wine is nothing more than a gentle kiss
Chardonnay and sauvignon blanc are more friend than foe
While any red wine rocks me into full blown stereo
Pinot noir and merlot make me lose all control
Committing crimes and looking for a loophole
Though my actions are tragic-al
Red wine will always be magical
True, the red grape might put me on my ass
But believe me, there is truth in the bottom of every glass
Maybe I really am an insane type of lass
A glass of red wine bumps my game from coach to first class

Strange Brew

2006-11-11T11:50:00.000-05:00

I used to brew my own beer
I drank it, too...let's make things clear
I'd rock some fat diamonds while I stirred my potion
That a homebrewer needs to look rough is an outdated notion
My dreams were about specific gravity and fermentation
Hours were lost thinking about condensation and evaporation
Bottling and capping was no big deal
My beer was so heavy--it was more like a meal
I brewed brown ale, stout and a kick-ass bock
When I finished a batch, my neighbors would knock
We'd hang out and sample all my hard work
Laughing too loud while haters would lurk
In an ideal world, girly girls wouldn't brew
But our planet's not perfect...so what could I do?

Cough Syrup

2006-11-07T00:35:00.000-05:00

This isn't a drink you'd order at a bar
If you want to get your drunk on, though, it will take you far
I took it because I had a barky kind of cough
One teaspoon later and I was taking off
I'm not kidding--my body seemed to accelerate
I felt jet-propelled and my synapses seemed to fire late
My head felt spinny
My mouth tasted tinny
I prayed that I had actually taken cough syrup
And not some kind of hallucinogenic
I was talking to people that no one else could see
I applied cosmetics because it's all about me
I fell asleep laughing and when I came to
My psyche laughed back and softly whispered boo...

White Wine Ho

2006-11-05T16:22:00.000-05:00

Her husband says she's sinking
And that he's worried about her drinking
She laughs and winks and opens some wine
She thanks God for the glorious grape vine
She loves to swirl her glass and take little sips
Kind of like a swimmer takes little dips
Before long she'll be floating in her buttery drink
Before long she'll be heading out in a coat that's mink
She doesn't like crack but she's a white wine ho
She doesn't want meth, she's got places to go
Her husband called her a chardonnay freak
She'd do anything for a bottle that wasn't weak
She didn't need to leave her hood to find her fix
She just checked out the wine rack to get her kicks
Cakebread, Coppola and Grgich Hills
For her, if there was a way--there was a will
Dinner would burn and her kids would fight
After two sips, she knew it would be all right
In her cashmere sweater and shredded jeans
This girl could care less about the coffee bean
Give her some cool, crisp vino
And she was way beyond fino
Liquor wasn't her style
But she would walk ten miles
And all day
For a bottle of tasty chardonnay

Anatomy of a Hangover

2006-11-05T14:01:00.000-05:00

When our girl wakes up after a night of drinking

She can't help but exclaim, "What was I thinking?!"

Visions of the previous night unfold like a horror flick

Her head feels like a soccer ball, surviving kick after kick

She shakes her head gently to measure the ache

Being an it girl is more than her body can take

Our girl checks for ten intact digits and proper length of hair

Her last memory is of playing an extreme game of truth or dare

Her stomach churns--even her blood cells seem mad

Why must she pay this price whenever a good time is had?

Questions race through her mind at a painful speed

This is a cautionary tale, readers--please, take heed

Did she really dance on the bar?

Was that her leaning out of the window of his car?

Respect the hangover and everything it says

Waking up clear headed can only mean better days

Drunken Dreams

2006-10-31T00:12:00.000-05:00

Too many libations

Turn my dreams into sensations

School busses collide with giant toothbrushes

I see fountains from which mac and cheese rushes

Whether it's Chardonnay or Beefeater, rocks...

Drunken dreams knock off my socks

I wake up shivering and smiling at the same time

Should drinking and dreaming be considered a crime?

Booze helps give my dreams voice

Sobriety or inebriation--it really isn't a choice

I love the movies that play in my mind

I watch them once, then press rewind

Tequila

2006-10-30T20:42:00.000-05:00

Tequila is not just for drunk girls on spring break

It's actually one of my favorite shots to take

I like the color--kind of like amber

And it works quickly, which is great, because I'm not really a gambler

I'd rather throw two back than nurse several beers

Just like I'd rather ignore, not embrace, my many fears

I love its slow burn and what it does to my mind

The wheels start turning with an excruciating grind

Tequila is the liquor that makes me sit up straight

Helps me organize my thoughts and tempt my fate

A little glass, a little salt and a tangy green lime

If you've got tequila, I've got the time